A cigarette is a roll of paper, tobacco, and drugs, with a small fire on one end and a large fool at the other. Some of its chief benefits are cancer….

Women who are devoted to causes, such as overpopulation and the underprivileged [sic], are much less interested in fashion than, let's say, those who….

Nobody gets to live life backward. Look ahead, that is where your future lies..

At every party there are two kinds of people - those who want to go home and those who don't. The trouble is, they are usually married to each other..

Bragging is not an attractive trait, but let's be honest. A man who catches a big fish doesn't go home through an alley..

When life's problems seem overwhelming, look around and see what other people are coping with. You may consider yourself fortunate..

One trouble with trouble is that it usually starts out like fun..

People have one year after the wedding to send a gift. Thank-you notes must be written immediately. If you don't receive an acknowledgment within thr….

People who care about each other enjoy doing things for one another. They don't consider it servitude..

Assume nothing. Inside every dumb blond there may be a very smart brunette..

It means being able to resist the urge for immediate gratification and opt for the course of action that will pay off later..

The real trick is to stay alive as long as you live..

I advise keeping four feet on the floor and all hands on deck..

Nobody gets to live life backward. Look ahead; that is where your future lies. Opportunities are usually disguised as hard work, so most people don't….

Maturity is many things. It is the ability to base a judgment on the big picture, the long haul..

Television has proved that people will look at anything rather than each other..

Parents do not owe their progeny an inheritance no matter how much money they have. One of the surest ways to produce loafers and freeloaders is to l….

More divorces start in the bedroom than in any other room in the house..

Never let an opportunity pass to give a well-deserved compliment..

There could be no honor in a sure success, but much might be wrested from a sure defeat..

trouble is not a sign of inadequacy, stupidity or inferiority, but rather an inescapable part of life - proof that you are a card-carrying member of ….