I lowered the gun but didn’t holster it. Not just yet. She could turn out to be psychotic. Or a door-to-door salesperson..

It is sexy in here or is it just me?.

Chocolate and coffee ? Together ? Whoever came up with that combination should have won a Nobel Peace Prize. Or at least a subscription to Reader's D….

Insanity does NOT run in my family. It strolls through, takes it's time, and gets to know everyone personally - T-Shirt.

My goal in life is to have a psychiatric disorder named after me..

When I want your opinion, I'll remove the duct tape.--T-SHIRT.

What do you want?" "You," he said, his voice lowering an octave. "I want you, Dutch, body and soul. I want you in my bed every night. I want you ther….

This is one Fruit Loop beyond certifiable..

An integral part of any best friend's job is to immediately clear your computer history if you die..

There is a great need for a sarcasm font..

Do not disturb. Already there..

Don't judge me because I'm quiet. No one plans a murder out loud..

I meant to behave. There were just too many other options.--T-SHIRT.

I totally should've gone to Hogwarts when I had the chance..

I often question my sanity. Occasionally, it replies..

If it weren’t for physics and law enforcement, I’d be unstoppable..

If you must eat a banana in public, never make eye contact..

I chose the road less traveled. Now I'm lost..

I stop fighting my inner demons. We're on the same side now. T-shirt.

If I couldn't be a good example, I'd just have to be a horrible warning..

I went down like a drunken cowgirl trying to line dance to Metallica..