Lawyers-they get together all day and say to each other, "What can we postpone next?" The only thing they don't postpone, of course, is their bill, w….

I like terra firma; the more firma, the less terra..

When I was born I owed twelve dollars..

You can't fool me. There ain't no Sanity Clause!.

At dramatic rehearsals, the only author that's better than an absent one is a dead one..

Office hours are from 12 to 1 with an hour off for lunch..

I've never had any complaints yet!.

The kind of doctor I want is one who when he's not examining me is home studying medicine..

Satire is what closes on Saturday night..

God finally caught his eye..

You've heard of people living in a fool's paradise? Well, Leonora has a duplex there..

There was laughter in the back of the theater, leading to the belief that someone was telling jokes back there..