Explore Quotes by Jasper Fforde

Death doesn't care about personalities - he's more interested in meeting quotas.

There's something rotten in the state of Denmark, and Hamlet says...it's payback time!

To each our own Hamlet.

If it's a chimera alert, we just follows the screams.

Fiction wouldn't be much fun without its fair share of scoundrels, and they have to live somewhere.

Sometimes I don't know whether I'm thening or nowing.

I have the death sentence in seven genres.

Books may look like nothing more than words on a page, but they are actually an infinitely complex imaginotransference technology that translates odd, inky squiggles into pictures inside your head.

Literary detection and firearms don't really go hand in hand; pen mighter than the sword and so forth.

I also read about Heathcliff's unexpected three-year career in Hollywood under the name Buck Stallion and his eventual return to the pages of Wuthering Heights.

I was on HPD--Heathcliff Protection Duty--in Wuthering Heights for two years, and believe me, the ProCaths tried everything. I personally saved him from assassination eight times.

If you expect me to believe that a lawyer wrote A Midsummer Night's Dream, I must be dafter than I look.

I got Oedipus off the incest charge--technicality, of course--he didn't know it was his mother at the time.

True and baseless evil is as rare as the purest good - and we all know how rare that is.

I would so hate to be a first-person character! Always on your guard, always having people read your thoughts!