What creates a writer is huge, psychological dysfunction..

People who say that money can't buy happiness just don't know where to shop..

Age to women is what kryptonite is to Superman. Inside every older woman is a younger woman screaming, 'Get me the hell outta here.'.

Teenagers are obviously God's punishment for having sex in the first place..

I am allergic to domestic goddesses. Men would prefer a woman with a dirty mind to a clean house..

Men think monogamy is something you make dining tables out of..

If he wants breakfast in bed, tell him to sleep in the kitchen..

Why do men like intelligent women? Because opposites attract..

Women want to be treated as equals, not sequels..

Good art is in the wallet of the beholder..

As a breastfeeding mother you are basically just meals on heels..

Age to women is like Kryptonite to Superman..

Basically it's just a whole bunch of blokes standing around scratching themselves.

Every woman wants to be wanted - just not by the entire Metropolitan police force..

Love is like a tide. When it's in, everything looks beautiful and inviting. Only when love recedes can you see the debris beneath the surface - the o….

Well if manners maketh man make-up maketh woman.And we don't need a phalanx of behavioural scientists to explain why man judge women by their looks.B….

I speak as your native guide to the mysterious tribe called the English. Dress code is everything. You can be a card-carrying Nazi, you can pay gigol….

Believe me, having a teenage daughter is like living with the Taliban..

I knew absolutely nothing about bondage. I'd always presumed it was just an inventive way of keeping your partner from going home..

The truth is, my experience in matters sexual is limited..

. . . planning a brilliant menu and preparing it beautifully doesn't guarantee a recipe for success..