I don't like this." "I know you don't, my little spaetzel. But I am too worn out to run from both the police and your murderous twin, and Damian's lo….

A compliment would be the last thing out of my mouth to a man who was so pigheaded that he could be served at a luau..

Do you want me to ride you like a rented mule, or do you prefer to be Mr. Missionary Position? I'm fine with wither, so it doesn't matter to me..

You do not interrupt a man when he is explaining his master plan after having been soundly defeated. Don't you watch any James Bond Movies?.

Well, possibly," I said, feeling my lips twitch again. "But maybe first you would tell us why you chose to manifest yourself in the form of Shirley T….

What do you know about dragons?” “They're big, scaly, four-legged creatures with wings who terrorized small villages until a virgin was offered up as….

What's a friend for if not to face almost certain death with, eh?.

...my soul bleeding tears of anguish.

You are too arrogant for your own good. I officially de-mate you. Go away. I never want to see you again. Except maybe tonight. Naked. Your place. Bu….

You should just dump the whole saving the world plan and go with global domination. It's probably be more fun..

I tried to avoid looking at the dress full on, lest it burn out my retinas with its glittering hideousness..

He says he had to go help someone in a desperate situation. Who, exactly, he refuses to say. He doesn’t know when he’s going to be back, but suggests….

Women are such contrary creatures when it comes to sex. You parade around like scantily clad vixens but blush when you're caught staring at the erect….

He does not see as i have that you have given him your heart, but he is male. We will cut him some slack for that handicap, yes?.

An hour and seven minutes after walking up. I stood with Noelle outside the Trust's house and prepared to raise my first -- and hopefully only -- dem….

I walked over to Drake and stomped on his foot. Hard. "What will I give you to help me? What will I give you?" He stood on one leg rubbing his foot, ….

Yeah. I know. How stupid is it to French kiss a vampire and not expect sharp teeth?.

My life used to be boring. A damnation here, a curse there, with an occasional blight or two to break routine. Now I have Aisling...She's better than….

What do you know about women?" They smell nice, they don't like to be told they can't do something, and, when they're naked, they hold some sort of m….

Hey!” I said, indignation filling me. “I’m immortal! Doesn’t that mean I won’t get saggy boobs and gray hair? Because if it doesn’t mean that, I want….

Just because I'm flaunting it doesn't mean you can stare for hours on end. A polite ogle is appreciated and suitable for a flaunt. Slobbering is not..