Mark Twain

Necessity is the mother of taking chances.

A few fly bites cannot stop a spirited horse.

Giving up smoking is the easiest thing in the world. I know because I've done it thousands of times.

If there was two birds sitting on a fence, he would bet you which one would fly first.

Everything human is pathetic. The secret source of humor itself is not joy but sorrow. There is no humor in heaven.

Obscurity and a competence—that is the life that is best worth living.

I have spent most of my time worrying about things that have never happened. Worrying is not an action! In fact, it is action that alleviates concern and dissipates worries. Take more actions when you feel that worry is creeping in to steal your time. It need not be a huge action, any action in the direction you want to go will do.

One frequently only finds out how really beautiful a beautiful woman is after considerable acquaintance with her.

Don't part with your illusions. When they are gone you may still exist, but you have ceased to live. To live a fulfilled life, we need to keep creating the "what is next", of our lives. Without dreams and goals there is no living, only merely existing, and that is not why we are here.

Habit is habit and not to be flung out of the window by any man, but coaxed downstairs a step at a time. You cannot eliminate habits that no longer serve you. You can only replace them with new habits that support your goals. Moment by moment, you need to live with awareness and structure the habits that you include or exclude in your days.

It is by the goodness of God that in our country we have those three unspeakably precious things: freedom of speech, freedom of conscience, and the prudence never to practice either of them.

Men think they think upon the great political questions, and they do; but they think with their party, not independently; they read its literature, but not that of the other side

Thou shalt not commit adultry is a command which makes no distinction between the following persons. They are all required to obey it: children at birth. Children in the cradle. School children. Youths and maidens. Fresh adults. Older ones. Men and women of 40. Of 50. Of 60. Of 70. Of 80. Of 100. The command does not distribute its burden equally, and cannot. It is not hard upon the three sets of children.

Every man is a moon; he has a side no one sees.

Never have a battle of wits with an unarmed person.

If you don't like the weather in New England now, just wait a few minutes.

He was a solemn, unsmiling, sanctimonious old iceberg who looked like he was waiting for a vacancy in the Trinity.

Tell me about a person's family, friends, and community, and I'll tell you what his opinions are.

We are discreet sheep; we wait to see how the drove is going, and then go with the drove.

It could probably be shown by facts and figures that there is no distinctly native criminal class except Congress.

It is higher and nobler to be kind.