Reporters thrive on the world's misfortune. For this reason they often take an indecent pleasure in events that dismay the rest of humanity..

Caution: These verses may be hazardous to your solemnity..

When sudden death takes a president, opportunities for new beginnings flourish among the ambitious and the tensions among such people can be dramatic….

There was scarcely a woman alive, it seemed, who could resist the urge to haul men down onto beds, car seats, kitchen floors, dining-room tables, par….

Industrial-strength foolishness sets in-in males, at least-at about the age of 18. This is why the military prefers males in the 18-to-25-year-old ra….

A $10 million windfall? At today's prices, I'd feel almost as rich as I did one day in 1936 when I found a dime on the sidewalk and blew the whole wa….

What [man landing on the moon] is doing up there is indulging his obsession with the impossible. The impossible infuriates and tantalizes him. Show h….

Etiquette is the grease that makes it possible for all of us to rub together without unnecessary overheating..

The old notion that brevity is the essence of wit has succumbed to the modern idea that tedium is the essence of quality..

Like all young reporters - brilliant or hopelessly incompetent - I dreamed of the glamorous life of the foreign correspondent: prowling Vienna in a B….

Usually, terrible things that are done with the excuse that progress requires them are not really progress at all, but just terrible things..

Ah, summer, what power you have to make us suffer and like it..

Journalism was being whittled away by a Wall Street theory that profits can be maximized by minimizing the product..

Schoolteachers seemed determined to persuade me that 'classic' is a synonym for 'narcotic'..

When you're the only pea in the pod, your parents are likely to get you confused with the Hope diamond..

Journalist: A person with nothing on his mind and the power to express it..

Life seemed to be an educator's practical joke in which you spent the first half learning and the second half learning that everything you learned in….

My natural instinct after doing something shameful is not to rush into the street boasting about it but to put on dark glasses and head for the next ….

A person whose job is deep thinking about atomic war would no more call a 'megadeath' a 'million corpses' than an embalmer would refer to a 'loved on….

A group of politicians deciding to dump a President because his morals are bad is like the Mafia getting together to bump off the Godfather for not g….

The lobbies of the new hotels and the Pan American Building exhale a chill as from the unopened Pharaonic tombs... And in their marble labyrinths the….