There is such a thing as too much couth..

Santa Barbara people are conservative-not like in L.A., where everybody wears rhinestones on their glasses to show that they own an airplane factory..

One stifling summer afternoon last August, in the attic of a tiny stone house in Pennsylvania, I made a most interesting discovery: the shortest, che….

"In France," Marcel said with wintry dignity, "accidents occur in the bedroom, not the kitchen.".

I'll dispose of my teeth as I see fit, and after they've gone, I'll get along. I started off living on gruel, and by God, I can always go back to it ….

Tomatoes and squash never fail to reach maturity. You can spray them with acid, beat them with sticks and burn them; they love it..

The worst disgrace that can befall a producer is an unkind notice from a New York reviewer. When this happens, the producer becomes a pariah in Holly….

I guess I'm just an old mad scientist at bottom. Give me an underground laboratory, half a dozen atom-smashers, and a beautiful girl in a diaphanous ….

I don't know where we're going or how we'll get there, but when we get there we'll be there - and that's something, even if it's nothing..

Fate was dealing from the bottom of the deck..

Only the scenario writers are exempt. These are tied between the tails of two spirited Caucasian ponies, which are then driven off in opposite direct….

The main obligation is to amuse yourself..

I have no truck with lettuce, cabbage, and similar chlorophyll. Any dietitian will tell you that a running foot of apple strudel contains four times ….

The dubious privilege of a freelance writer is he’s given the freedom to starve anywhere..

In my more pompous moments I like to think of myself as a writer rather than a humorist, but I suppose that's merely the vanity of advancing age..

The fact is that all of us have only one personality, and we wring it out like a dishtowel. You are what you are..

I found the pearl of the Orient slightly less exciting than a rainy Sunday evening in Rochester..

He bit his lip in a manner which immediately awakened my maternal sympathy, and I helped him bite it..

If, at the close of business each evening, I myself can understand what I've written, I feel the day hasn't been totally wasted..

English life, while very pleasant, is rather bland. I expected kindness and gentility and I found it, but there is such a thing as too much couth..

I tried to resist his overtures, but he plied me with symphonies, quartets, chamber music, and cantatas..