If you owe fifty dollars you're a piker; if you owe fifty thousand dollars you're a businessman; if you owe fifty million dollars you're a tycoon; if….

We should not permit prayer to be taken out of the schools; that's the only way most of us got through..

For Attractive lips, speak words of kindness. For lovely eyes, seek out the good in people. For a slim figure, share your food with the hungry. Fo….

It's not the sugar that makes the tea sweet, but the stirring..

People, more than things, have to be restored, renewed, revived, reclaimed, and redeemed..

It's so simple to be wise. Just think of something stupid to say and say the opposite..

Lead us not into temptation. Just tell us where it is; we'll find it..

You don't have to be in "Who's Who" to know what's what..

It was on my fifth birthday that Papa put his hand on my shoulder and said, 'Remember, my son, if you ever need a helping hand, you'll find one at th….

If you die in an elevator, be sure to push the Up button..

One of the virtues of being very young is that you don't let the facts get in the way of your imagination..

The reason God made man before woman was that he didn't want any suggestions..

Never lend money to a friend. It's dangerous. It could damage his memory..

You must learn from the mistakes of others. You can't possibly live long enough to make them all yourself..

I'm going to stop putting things off, starting tomorrow!.

Life begins at forty, but so does arthritis, and the habit of telling the same story three times to the same person..

The longest word in the world is "a word from our sponsor.".

Insanity is hereditary; you get it from your children..

Courage is walking naked through a cannibal village.

We may not always see eye to eye, but we can try to see heart to heart..

Siblings: children of the same parents, each of whom is perfectly normal until they get together..