Asthma doesn't seem to bother me any more unless I'm around cigars or dogs. The thing that would bother me most would be a dog smoking a cigar..

One of the nice things about problems is that a good many of them do not exist except in our imaginations..

If the Old Testament were a reliable guide in the matter of capital punishment, half the people in the United States would have to be killed tomorrow..

Millions of Germans had absolute faith in Hitler. Millions of Russians had faith in Stalin. Millions of Chinese had faith in Mao. Billions have had f….

There is scarcely a page of the Bible on which an open mind does not perceive a contradiction, an unlikely story, an obvious error, an historical imp….

There are few pages of history which do not demonstrate that public prayer and ritual never inoculated people against mass-madness and cruelty. What ….

The problem is that once the untrained mind has made a formal commitment to a religious philosophy - and it does not matter whether that philosophy i….

Without laughter life on our planet would be intolerable. So important is laughter to us that humanity highly rewards members of one of the most unus….

Religious believers of the world, you are free to continue to debate the simple, narrow question that divides you from atheists, but you have no righ….

...we are entitled to make almost any reasonable assumption, but should resist making conclusions until evidence requires that we do so..

Thousands of years ago only Christ could walk on the water. Today anybody can do it; you just step on the garbage..

This is The Tonight Show. I can't tell you too much about it, other than the fact that this program is going to go on forever..

Ours is a government of checks and balances. The Mafia and crooked businessmen make out checks, and the politicians and other compromised officials i….

If there is a God, the phrase that must disgust him is - holy war..

Everybody is somewhere..

Humor is a social lubricant that helps us get over some of the bad spots..

Ideas have consequences, and totally erroneous ideas are likely to have destructive consequences..

In a rational society we would want our presidents to be teachers. In our actual society we insist they be cheerleaders..

Radio is the theater of the mind; television is the theater of the mindless..

Civilization itself . . . can easily be swept aside when mob passions are aroused..

Totalitarianism is patriotism institutionalized..