Sadly, I cant avoid being 75. Like many people of my age, we are all heading towards the grim reaper, and I am clinging on. I just to have to sharpen….

But they're laughing at you. They're not laughing with you..

Worried about a skin condition? Leap smartly into a bath of porridge..

Don't start drinking before the fifth song..

I suppose I should make a little apology to Cyndi - although I'm not taking the blame for this - because I was the one who did say Cyndi had won..

Who knows what hellish future lies ahead? ... Actually, I do. I've seen the rehearsals..

Television contracts the imagination and radio expands it..

Jamie Oliver's lunch is soup, half a papaya with lime, ciabatta with mozzarella and prosciutto. The dear boy is not sharing the same planet as the re….

There's not enough silliness in the world. Eurovision helps to keep it balanced..

People who are successful should never forget that its 90 per cent luck. Youve got to be an eejit to be an egomaniac. I had my glory years - Blankety….

The culture now in television is that the presenter calls the financial and, increasingly, the creative shots. It is comparable to what happened in H….

I don't make the mistake of thinking it's a major musical event. I love the Eurovision Song Contest and it will continue long after I'm gone. Just pl….