If one might wish for impossibilities, I might then wish that my children might be well versed in physical science, but in due subordination to the f….

People still question my sobriety, my commitment to the program, and that hurts. I take things day by day, and sometimes I take them minute by minute….

Women; can't live with em, can't kill em.

It's pretty lonely and sad to be single. Every night was the same for me, I'd go home and curl up in bed with my favorite book. Well, actually it was….

If you're spending a lot of time in the writers' room and then you're also acting, you have your foot in both of those doors. I'd always say to the w….

When you work with your wife you really have no "me" time, or place to get away and be with the guys, because you're at work all day together, and th….

The misconception about Hollywood is that it's a crazy drug and alcohol fueled place. It can be but there's also a huge sober community..

Any time your head explodes, that's not a good situation..

Kids; 10 seconds of joy, 30 years of misery.

If you want to make a substantial reduction in your carbon footprint, doing it on your own is virtually impossible, especially if you're driving a ca….

Environmentalists have a very conflicted relationship with their cars..

The difference between one man and another is not mere ability... it is energy..

The nature of show business is people within the business feel that if someone else fails, they move up a notch..

My wife's nagging is like living near the airport. After a while you don't notice it any more..

Hey, Warren, the Raiders signed you to a seven-year deal. I guess Bill Callahan was right - they are the dumbest team in America..

I didn't quit football because I failed a drug test, I failed a test because I was ready to quite football..

To the extent that movies get released, they are generally not big box-office generators. Hollywood is clearly focusing on their holiday releases com….

Dating is so insecure. My last relationship, I was always there for her and she dumped me. I told her about it. I said, "Remember when your grandma d….

There are people who believe once somebody gets you a job in show business you are set and the truth is you have to fight for every job. People opene….