Speaking of love, one problem that recurs more and more frequently these days, in books and plays and movies, Is the inability of people to communica….

I find enough mystery in mathematics to satisfy my spiritual needs. I think, for example, that pi is mysterious enough (don't get me started!) withou….

I went from adolescence to senility, trying to bypass maturity..

Life is like a piano. What you get out of it depends on how you play it..

Always predict the worst, and you'll be hailed as a prophet..

Bad weather always looks worse through a window..

I know that there are people who do not love their fellow man, and I hate people like that!.

Alas, irreverence has been subsumed by mere grossness, at least in the so-called mass media. What we have now - to quote myself at my most pretentiou….

It is a sobering thought that when Mozart was my age, he had been dead for two years..

When correctly viewed, everything is lewd..

Don't write naughty words on the wall if you can't spell!.

I always like to make explicit the fact that before I went off not too long ago to fight in the trenches, I was a mathematician by profession. I don'….

Once the rockets are up, who cares where they come down ? That's not my department..

The Army has carried the American... ideal to its logical conclusion... Not only do they prohibit discrimination on the grounds of race, creed and co….

Plagiarize! Plagiarize, Let no one else's work evade your eyes, Remember why the good Lord made your eyes, So don't shade your eyes, But plagiarize, ….

As for language, almost everything goes now. That is not to say that verbal taboos have disappeared, but merely that they have shifted somewhat. In m….

"Life is like a sewer - what you get out of it depends on what you put into it." It's always seemed to me that this is precisely the sort of dynamic,….

Political satire became obsolete when they awarded Henry Kissinger the Nobel Peace Prize..

On my income tax 1040 it says 'Check this box if you are blind.' I wanted to put a check mark about three inches away..

People are stupider than anybody..

You cant be satirical and not be offensive to somebody..