After 12 years in the minor leagues, I don't try out. Besides, uh, I don't believe in quantum physics when it comes to matters of the heart.

- Crash Davis

The rose goes on the front, big guy.

- Crash Davis

I have been known on occasion to howl at the moon.

- Crash Davis

Know what the difference between hitting .250 and .300 is? It's 25 hits - 25 hits in 500 at-bats is 50 points. There's six months in a season, that's…

- Crash Davis

Your shower shoes have fungus on them. You'll never make it to the bigs with fungus on your shower shoes. Think classy, you'll be classy. If you win …

- Crash Davis