Dead. Never been that before. Not even once.

- Jasper Fforde

Almost anything can be improved with the addition of bacon.

- Jasper Fforde

To each our own Hamlet.

- Jasper Fforde

For every expert there is an equal and opposite expert.

- Jasper Fforde

Cats aren't really friendly, they're just cozying up to the dominant life-form as a hedge against extinction.

- Jasper Fforde

If the real world were a book, it would never find a publisher.

- Jasper Fforde

Failure concentrates the mind wonderfully. If you don't make mistakes, you're not trying hard enough.

- Jasper Fforde

If the real world were a book, it would never find a publisher. Overlong, detailed to the point of distraction-and ultimately, without a major resolu…

- Jasper Fforde

We're in a psuedoscientific technobabble.

- Jasper Fforde