You should always speak your mind, and be bold, and be obnoxious, and do whatever you want and don’t let anybody tell you to stop it.
I'll tell you what can make bacon better... nothing. - Chelsea Handler
I'll tell you what can make bacon better... nothing.
- Chelsea Handler
My mother told me that life isn't always about pleasing yourself and that sometimes you have to do things for the sole benefit of another human being… - Chelsea Handler
My mother told me that life isn't always about pleasing yourself and that sometimes you have to do things for the sole benefit of another human being…
Most republicans are against contraception because they don't care about it. You can't get pregnant anally anyway. - Chelsea Handler
Most republicans are against contraception because they don't care about it. You can't get pregnant anally anyway.
I went out with a guy who once told me I didn’t need to drink to make myself more fun to be around. I told him, I’m drinking so that you’re more fun … - Chelsea Handler
I went out with a guy who once told me I didn’t need to drink to make myself more fun to be around. I told him, I’m drinking so that you’re more fun …
I don't like the word 'alcoholic'. I like to think of myself as an advanced drinker. - Chelsea Handler
I don't like the word 'alcoholic'. I like to think of myself as an advanced drinker.
I never say the things I really want to. If I did, I'd have no friends. - Chelsea Handler
I never say the things I really want to. If I did, I'd have no friends.
I'm very much about letting other people shine, because it makes us all shine brighter. - Chelsea Handler
I'm very much about letting other people shine, because it makes us all shine brighter.
I think we can all agree that sleeping around is a great way to meet people. - Chelsea Handler
I think we can all agree that sleeping around is a great way to meet people.
It’s true what they say about patience being a virtue; it just happens to be a virtue that I choose not to pursue. - Chelsea Handler
It’s true what they say about patience being a virtue; it just happens to be a virtue that I choose not to pursue.
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