An antique is anything old with class.

- John Bartlett

To resist him that is set in authority is evil

- John Bartlett

Reservation should be under 'Bartlett.' Right, that's two T's. Yes. 'Bart-let-et.'

- John Bartlett

Oh, nice one, honey. Yes. Clever. That's becoming quite a familiar quotation in its own right, isn't it? Maybe I should just add it to the next editi…

- John Bartlett

Being offended is a choice. I believe that. You don't have - you don't hear a word and you have to be offended.

- John Bartlett

You have the right to be offended or not to be offended.

- John Bartlett