I couldn't get away with Halloween pranks 'cause my parents owned the health food store. So, it was so easy to bust me. I was the only kid on the block egging houses with those big 'ole brown eggs. Like, you didn't have to be a detective to figure it out. 'Oh, I wonder who Tofuttied my mailbox. Is it the same evil genius who filled my bird bath with Rice Dream?
A woman is a highly developed, deeply intelligent, infinitely complicated being. And it needs to be carefully tricked into doing things. - Arj Barker
A woman is a highly developed, deeply intelligent, infinitely complicated being. And it needs to be carefully tricked into doing things.
- Arj Barker
I know that most domesticated animals aren't indigenous to this country. So guess what, cat? You can beat it. Go back to Catalina Island or Catalonia… - Arj Barker
I know that most domesticated animals aren't indigenous to this country. So guess what, cat? You can beat it. Go back to Catalina Island or Catalonia…
I believe that if you go on a date and get to second base and then you go home alone and rub one out, that's like runs batted in. - Arj Barker
I believe that if you go on a date and get to second base and then you go home alone and rub one out, that's like runs batted in.
I'm not even worried about settling down. I think it's way too early. I'm 25 and I'm in show business. I mean, if things go well, my wife hasn't even… - Arj Barker
I'm not even worried about settling down. I think it's way too early. I'm 25 and I'm in show business. I mean, if things go well, my wife hasn't even…
I was high on life but eventually I built up a tolerance. - Arj Barker
I was high on life but eventually I built up a tolerance.
Just open your heart man and accept that people are gay. Thousands, probably millions of people are gay. And until we find a cure - we will practice … - Arj Barker
Just open your heart man and accept that people are gay. Thousands, probably millions of people are gay. And until we find a cure - we will practice …
I quit because I'm so tired of hearing bad news about cigarettes... Even if they discover good news, they don't publicize it - like the fact that smo… - Arj Barker
I quit because I'm so tired of hearing bad news about cigarettes... Even if they discover good news, they don't publicize it - like the fact that smo…
I'm trying to feel terrified and alone. And regret every decision I've ever made, drenched in a cold sweat. It's called going to sleep. Maybe you've … - Arj Barker
I'm trying to feel terrified and alone. And regret every decision I've ever made, drenched in a cold sweat. It's called going to sleep. Maybe you've …
It's gotten to the point where I think my friends would rather hang out with their own kids than hang out with me. And I'm like, "Alright, but where'… - Arj Barker
It's gotten to the point where I think my friends would rather hang out with their own kids than hang out with me. And I'm like, "Alright, but where'…
Login to join the discussion
Login to join the discussion