It's so bad I could putt off a tabletop and still leave the ball halfway down the leg.

- J. C. Snead

If golfers can run around and crow when they make a birdie, I think it would be just as proper to lie down on the green and cry when you make a bogey.

- J. C. Snead

I go to the first tee scared to death every day. The peaks do not seem to last as long as the valleys in this game.

- J. C. Snead