Blacks can get into medical school with a lower grade ... If that's true, a Jew should be able to play basketball with a lower net.
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I have nothing but love in my heart and everything I say is just an instrument for laughs.
Would you put a pastrami in your mouth if you didn't want to eat it?
They call it football, but the object of the game is to bash the other guy so hard that he's eventually carried off the field on a stretcher. I can't watch football anymore. My psychiatrist said it's better that way. I used to watch a game, see the players in a huddle - and think they were talking about me.
People come to my shows and know that they're going to hear about what's going on in the world - what's happening at the moment. My material is as new as anything on the dinner table.
Predictions are preposterous.
Older Jews think of Franklin Delano Roosevelt and see themselves as siding with the working class and the poor, so they continue to vote the way they do.
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