The California cemeteries make dying sound so attractive it's a real effort to keep breathing.
I'm not saying these flying discs don't really exist, but nobody living in Kansas City has seen them and that's a dry state. - Jack Paar
I'm not saying these flying discs don't really exist, but nobody living in Kansas City has seen them and that's a dry state.
- Jack Paar
Hollywood, we decided, was a nice place to die, but we wouldn't want to live there. - Jack Paar
Hollywood, we decided, was a nice place to die, but we wouldn't want to live there.
I have never seen a bad television program, because I refuse to. God gave me a mind, and a wrist that turns things off. - Jack Paar
I have never seen a bad television program, because I refuse to. God gave me a mind, and a wrist that turns things off.
To restore a sense of reality, I think Walt Disney should have a Hardluckland. - Jack Paar
To restore a sense of reality, I think Walt Disney should have a Hardluckland.
Poor people have more fun than rich people, they say; and I notice it's the rich people who keep saying it. - Jack Paar
Poor people have more fun than rich people, they say; and I notice it's the rich people who keep saying it.
Immigration is the sincerest form of flattery. - Jack Paar
Immigration is the sincerest form of flattery.
It's almost impossible to dislike me, because I do nothing. - Jack Paar
It's almost impossible to dislike me, because I do nothing.
As I look back on my life, I see it as one long obstacle course with myself as the main obstacle. - Jack Paar
As I look back on my life, I see it as one long obstacle course with myself as the main obstacle.
Randy and I were goggle-eyed as we gazed over the wonders of what Walt Disney had wrought. It was a magnificent demonstration of what God could do if… - Jack Paar
Randy and I were goggle-eyed as we gazed over the wonders of what Walt Disney had wrought. It was a magnificent demonstration of what God could do if…
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