I like Cilantro, but you don't have to.

- Todd Barry

I will not be misquoted!

- Todd Barry

I like pens. My writing is so amazing there's never a need to erase

- Todd Barry

I don't ban bloggers from my shows. I have a separate line: VIP seating for bloggers.

- Todd Barry

I mean, I've always had scattered interests, but I never went on stage to get an agent or anything like that

- Todd Barry

If I'm at a party and someone puts on a Blues Brothers tape, I tend to go nuts.

- Todd Barry

I'd rather send out a mass email then hang posters all over the place

- Todd Barry

Buddha, much like everyone else has good and bad days.

- Todd Barry

My sister sometimes does a Todd Barry tribute act.

- Todd Barry