If you're more than three feet away from a housefly, it can't see you.

- L. M. Boyd

It has long been believed that a man who gets bald across the front of his head is a thinker while a man who gets bald on the crown of his head is a …

- L. M. Boyd

Anyone who eats three meals a day should understand why cookbooks outsell sex books three to one.

- L. M. Boyd

Having a baby isn't so bad. If you're a female Emperor penguin in the Antarctic. She lays the egg, rolls it over to the father, then takes off for wa…

- L. M. Boyd

Chopsticks or no chopsticks, it was the Chinese who first used knives and forks.

- L. M. Boyd

That phrase "hocus-pocus" started out as "hocus-pocus dominocus", and was, in the beginning, a mocking imitation of the holy incantations of the Cath…

- L. M. Boyd

No single expression denotes love. It's so complex it requires combinations of expressions. These create an identifiable look. You see something like…

- L. M. Boyd

There are 350 varieties of shark, not counting loan and pool.

- L. M. Boyd

The code of Hammurabi in ancient Babylon prescribed this punishment for a doctor convicted of inept surgery: amputation of the hands.

- L. M. Boyd