To defy the laws of tradition is a crusade only of the brave.

- Les Claypool

My favorite venues are the 2,000 seat theaters, like the Warfield. If there was a Warfield in every city, I would play it. That's all I would do. I l…

- Les Claypool

In the early days all I hoped was to make a living out of what I did best. But, since there's no real market for masturbation I had to fall back on m…

- Les Claypool

Comedians get jokes offered to them, rock stars get women and underwear thrown onstage, and I get guys that want to take me fishing.

- Les Claypool

Oh, welcome to this world of fools, of pink champagne and swimming pools, where all you have to lose is your virginity. Perhaps you'll have some fun …

- Les Claypool

We've all had our thing. I listened to the Monkees when I was little kid.

- Les Claypool

You might have a favorite book or film, but you can only watch or read it so many times before you have to let it sit and then go back and realize it…

- Les Claypool

I'm a big believer in spontaneity.

- Les Claypool

I'll run against the grain till the day I drop?

- Les Claypool