It was more like an abortion than music, but he got a wildly enthusiastic response from the crowd. Well, we're all pro-choice out here in Hillmont, a…

- Frank Portman

I was starting to realize the extent of the problem here: everyone is always lying to each other, and even when they're trying to tell the truth, it …

- Frank Portman

Monty Python: A documentary series on everyday life in Great Britain.

- Frank Portman

There's always a bit of suspense about the particular way in which a given school year will get off to a bad start.

- Frank Portman

D and D: a role-playing game played only by very cool guys.

- Frank Portman

High School is the penalty for transgressions yet to be specified.

- Frank Portman

Sam Hellerman is a genius!

- Frank Portman

Normal: lacking in taste, compassion, understanding, kindness, and ordinary human decency.

- Frank Portman

Maybe they notice me wincing whenever I hear them say it, but I don't know: there are all sorts of reasons I could be wincing. Life is a wince-a-thon.

- Frank Portman