My daughter made me a Jerry Springer-watching kit, with crackers, Cheez Whiz, polyester stretch pants and a T-shirt with two fat women fighting over a skinny guy.
Truth is available to the ears that can hear it. - Roseanne Barr
Truth is available to the ears that can hear it.
- Roseanne Barr
I'm not upset about my divorce. I'm only upset that I'm not a widow. - Roseanne Barr
I'm not upset about my divorce. I'm only upset that I'm not a widow.
Being nuts is its own reward. - Roseanne Barr
Being nuts is its own reward.
Half the world's starving; the other half is trying to lose weight. - Roseanne Barr
Half the world's starving; the other half is trying to lose weight.
The thing women have yet to learn is nobody gives you power. You just take it. - Roseanne Barr
The thing women have yet to learn is nobody gives you power. You just take it.
Excuse the mess but we live here. - Roseanne Barr
Excuse the mess but we live here.
As a housewife, I feel that if the kids are still alive when my husband gets home from work, then hey, I've done my job. - Roseanne Barr
As a housewife, I feel that if the kids are still alive when my husband gets home from work, then hey, I've done my job.
The day I worry about cleaning my house is the day Sears comes out with a riding vacuum cleaner. - Roseanne Barr
The day I worry about cleaning my house is the day Sears comes out with a riding vacuum cleaner.
Legalize hemp and allow women to grow it and make food, clothing and housing for pennies from it and legalize marijuana too. Let women integrate thei… - Roseanne Barr
Legalize hemp and allow women to grow it and make food, clothing and housing for pennies from it and legalize marijuana too. Let women integrate thei…
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