Inspirational Quotes, Motivational Sayings, and Wise Words for Daily Inspiration

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I used to have this dream that somebody was knocking at my door. I'd say 'Who is it?' and they'd answer 'Police.' I'd open the door and they would say to me, 'Pack your bags. We realized you have no talent.

Leslie Nielsen's Popular Quotes

One thing a person won't do when he's laughing is try to beat you up.

- Leslie Nielsen

Doing nothing is very hard to do... you never know when you're finished.

- Leslie Nielsen

Like a blind man at an orgy, I was going to have to feel my way through.

- Leslie Nielsen

I'm a professional actor. If I was a plumber, I wouldn't just do my plumbing in Beverly Hills bathrooms; I'd like to install air conditioning units a…

- Leslie Nielsen

Like a midget at a urinal I was going to have to stay on my toes.

- Leslie Nielsen

It's not really that I've been an advocate for hearing aids for a long time, it's just that I've been losing my hearing for a long time! So it's actu…

- Leslie Nielsen

I'm sure that we can handle this situation maturely, just like the responsible adults that we are. Isn't that right, Mr... Poopy Pants?

- Leslie Nielsen

It doesn't really matter where I go (Heaven or Hell). I'll have plenty of friends in both places.

- Leslie Nielsen

There's an old saying that God exists in your search for him. I just want you to understand that I ain't looking.

- Leslie Nielsen