Should check the Internet and make sure everything on there is correct.

- David Thorne

Without a concise set of rules to follow we would probably all have to resort to common sense

- David Thorne

Opinions are like nipples, everybody has one. Some have firm points, others are barely discernible through layers, and some are displayed at every op…

- David Thorne

You can't trust girls. When I get a girlfriend I am not going to tell her where I live or work.

- David Thorne

Do you ever think about having sex with Rosie O'Donnell because you are straight? Same thing.

- David Thorne

I would have assumed you understood, despite our vague suggestions otherwise, we do not welcome constructive criticism.

- David Thorne

I was taught never to make a threat unless you are prepared to carry it out, and I am not a fan of carrying anything. Even watching other people carr…

- David Thorne

While I do not have a boyfriend, I do have a friend who is homosexual and I once asked him "Do you ever think about having sex with me because you ar…

- David Thorne

the old man dance, where I tense up, shuffle my feet intermittently, complain about the music volume, and sit down for a rest.

- David Thorne