There was something appealing in thinking of a character with a secret life that her author knew nothing about. Slipping off while the author's back was turned, to find love in her own way. Showing up just in time to deliver the next bit of dialogue with an innocent face.
Every mother can easily imagine losing a child. Motherhood is always half loss anyway. The three-year-old is lost at five, the five-year-old at nine. We consort with ghosts, even as we sit and eat with, scold and kiss, their current corporeal forms. We speak to people who have vanished and, when they answer us, they do the same. Naturally, the information in these speeches is garbled in the translation.
Interpretation
What this quote means
This quote reflects the emotional complexities of motherhood, emphasizing the inevitable losses as children grow and change.
Karen Joy Fowler's quote explores the profound experience of motherhood, highlighting that mothers constantly grapple with the idea of loss as their children grow and evolve. Each stage of a child's development is marked by a sense of mourning for the previous version of the child that no longer exists, creating a unique mix of presence and absence. This relationship is imbued with emotions, where mothers engage with both the tangible and the ghostly remnants of who their children once were, acknowledging that these transitions can be painful yet are an intrinsic part of the nurturing process.
Themes
In practice
Example use cases
In a speech about parenting, you might reflect on the bittersweet nature of motherhood by quoting this.
More from Karen Joy Fowler
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I've seen fathers criticizing their sons the moment a game's over. Not my dad. It doesn't matter if I threw an interception or a Hail Mary, he always says, 'Good job, son, I'm proud of you.' Then he shakes my hand and gives me a hug. Every time.
But to me, the most important page in my daughter's book is the last one - because it's blank. It says, "Your Hero's Photo Here," and, "Your Hero's Story Here."
Who ran to help me when I fell, And would some pretty story tell, Or kiss the place to make it well? My mother.
I love my daddy. My daddy's everything. I hope I can find a man that will treat me as good as my dad.
Motherhood isn't just a series of contractions; it's a state of mind. From the moment we know life is inside us, we feel a responsibility to protect and defend that human being.
After momma gave birth to 12 of us kids, we put her up on a pedestal. It was mostly to keep Daddy away from her.