When you ask a girl out and she suggest a bar, you're answer shouldn't be great, I like that bar and they'll have the Rockets game on too.
I don't tend to like race jokes. I don't like Jew jokes and black jokes, and they make me very uncomfortable, probably because I'm both. Well, I'm no… - Iliza Shlesinger
I don't tend to like race jokes. I don't like Jew jokes and black jokes, and they make me very uncomfortable, probably because I'm both. Well, I'm no…
- Iliza Shlesinger
I wasn't a 'hot chick' in high school. I was 'funny' and a tomboy and probably a little uncomfortable with my amazing boobs. - Iliza Shlesinger
I wasn't a 'hot chick' in high school. I was 'funny' and a tomboy and probably a little uncomfortable with my amazing boobs.
As a comedian, as an entertainer, there's a lot of downtime. Once you can accept that comedy is a marathon, not a sprint, it gets a little easier. - Iliza Shlesinger
As a comedian, as an entertainer, there's a lot of downtime. Once you can accept that comedy is a marathon, not a sprint, it gets a little easier.
You know what happened the last time a group of people said, 'Screw it, we don't care what you think'? They got hung as witches. - Iliza Shlesinger
You know what happened the last time a group of people said, 'Screw it, we don't care what you think'? They got hung as witches.
Both are salty, one will give me carpal tunnel, I'll go with the fries. - Iliza Shlesinger
Both are salty, one will give me carpal tunnel, I'll go with the fries.
It feels amazing to just be here and be able to share my jokes with the world. It's not so much about being a girl, it's about being a funny comic. - Iliza Shlesinger
It feels amazing to just be here and be able to share my jokes with the world. It's not so much about being a girl, it's about being a funny comic.
Passion always finds a way. Follow your passion and everything else will work out. - Iliza Shlesinger
Passion always finds a way. Follow your passion and everything else will work out.
Ladies, just know that when you grow your hair too long, you got about two inches difference between really hot, sexy supermodel - religious fanatic.… - Iliza Shlesinger
Ladies, just know that when you grow your hair too long, you got about two inches difference between really hot, sexy supermodel - religious fanatic.…
You can't go to the bathroom alone... you might not come back. Cause no girl's ever been to the bathroom alone and survived. It's true. The last woma… - Iliza Shlesinger
You can't go to the bathroom alone... you might not come back. Cause no girl's ever been to the bathroom alone and survived. It's true. The last woma…
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