My grandmother is a little Cuban woman who cooks all day and speaks Spanish. Your grandmother watches pay-per-view porn." "She used to watch the Weather Channel, but she said there wasn't enough action." -Ranger and Stephanie
Your life isn't out of control. It's expanded. - Janet Evanovich
Your life isn't out of control. It's expanded.
- Janet Evanovich
Calories don’t count if they’re connected to a celebration. Everyone knows this. - Janet Evanovich
Calories don’t count if they’re connected to a celebration. Everyone knows this.
When I was six years old I sprinkled sugar on my head, convinced myself it was pixie dust, wished myself invisible, and walked into the boys' bathroo… - Janet Evanovich
When I was six years old I sprinkled sugar on my head, convinced myself it was pixie dust, wished myself invisible, and walked into the boys' bathroo…
The way I see it, life is a jelly doughnut. You don't really know what it's about until you bite into it. And then, just when you decided it's good, … - Janet Evanovich
The way I see it, life is a jelly doughnut. You don't really know what it's about until you bite into it. And then, just when you decided it's good, …
Personally, I'm a lazy kind of guy, and leaving the door open on the mystical saves me work. I don't have to stress my brain trying to explain the un… - Janet Evanovich
Personally, I'm a lazy kind of guy, and leaving the door open on the mystical saves me work. I don't have to stress my brain trying to explain the un…
Romance novels are birthday cake and life is often peanut butter and jelly. I think everyone should have lots of delicious romance novels lying aroun… - Janet Evanovich
Romance novels are birthday cake and life is often peanut butter and jelly. I think everyone should have lots of delicious romance novels lying aroun…
Only men you can count on these days are Ben and Jerry. - Janet Evanovich
Only men you can count on these days are Ben and Jerry.
A woman's never too old to make an idiot of herself. It goes along with equality of the sexes and potty parity. - Janet Evanovich
A woman's never too old to make an idiot of herself. It goes along with equality of the sexes and potty parity.
Okay, take a deep breath, I told myself. Don't go all hormonal. Get the facts straight. Have a mental doughnut. - Janet Evanovich
Okay, take a deep breath, I told myself. Don't go all hormonal. Get the facts straight. Have a mental doughnut.
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