I'm the gooney bird that walked to the bank. I'm doing better than most of those guys who said I was crazy.

- Jimmy Piersall

Spread the diaper in the position of the diamond with you at bat. Then fold second base down to home and set the baby on the pitcher's mound. Put f…

- Jimmy Piersall

I asked my doctor how many more years I have left and he said, 'You're too ornery to die.

- Jimmy Piersall

Nutrition makes me puke.

- Jimmy Piersall

I feel great. I had a triple bypass in 1976 and a quadruple bypass in 1984.

- Jimmy Piersall

I didn't get hurt in the contest. I hurt it the next day.

- Jimmy Piersall

If Kona were to get a new logo, it would have to be a original character, not some well know one.

- Jimmy Piersall

Probably the best thing that happened to me was going nuts. Nobody knew who I was until that happened.

- Jimmy Piersall

... I want the world to know that people like me who have returned from the half-world of mental oblivion are not forever contaminated. We have been …

- Jimmy Piersall