I'm not 'worked up' so much as 'fed up' with the rat faced whores in the Conservative Party who neglect to invite me to announcements in my riding.

- Pat Martin

Who the hell uses a burner cell phone when they're not trying to hide something? [..] Only dope dealers, and Hell's Angels, and Tony Soprano use burn…

- Pat Martin

Listen, I would never judge someone who screwed their babysitter for years or knocked up their secretary, so don't ask me to.

- Pat Martin