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Why do we focus so intensely on our problems? What draws us to them? Why are they so attractive? They have the magnet power of love: somehow we desire our problems; we are in love with them much as we want to get rid of them . . . Problems sustain us -- maybe that's why they don't go away. What would a life be without them? Completely tranquilized and loveless . . . There is a secret love hiding in each problem
James Hillman
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Interpretation

What this quote means

We often find ourselves drawn to our problems, as they provide us with a sense of purpose and engagement, similar to love.

In this quote, James Hillman explores the paradoxical nature of problems in our lives. He suggests that our fascination with problems stems from an intrinsic desire they fulfill, akin to the magnetic pull of love. Problems provide a sense of identity, engagement, and even a hidden affection, making it difficult to let go of them. Hillman proposes that our lives might feel devoid of meaning without these challenges, turning us into passive observers rather than active participants in our journey.

Themes

ProblemsLoveAttractionLifePurpose

In practice

Example use cases

In a motivational speech about facing challenges, one could use this quote to emphasize the importance of embracing difficulties.

More from James Hillman

Everything that everyone is afraid of has already happened: The fragility of capitalism, which we don't want to admit; the loss of the empire of the United States; and American exceptionalism. In fact, American exceptionalism is that we are exceptionally backward in about fifteen different categories, from education to infrastructure.
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Mediocrity is no answer to violence. In fact, it probably invites violence. At least the mediocre and the violent appear together as in the old Western movies - the ruffian outlaw band shooting up main street and the little white church with the little white schoolteacher wringing her hands. To cool violence you need rhythm, humor, tempering; you need dance and rhetoric. Not therapeutic understanding.
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Love alone is not enough. Without imagination, love stales into sentiment, duty, boredom. Relationships fail not because we have stopped loving but because we first stopped imagining.
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My war - and I have yet to win a decisive battle - is with the modes of thought that and conditioned feelings that prevail in psychology and therefore also in the way we think and feel about our being. Of these conditions none are more tyrannical than the convictions that clamp the mind and heart into positivistic science (geneticism and computerism), economics (bottom-line capitalism), and single-minded faith (fundamentalism).
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Instead of seeing depression as a dysfunction, it is a functioning phenomenon. It stops you cold, sets you down, makes you damn miserable.
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You don't attack the grunts of Vietnam; you blame the theory behind the war. Nobody who fought in that war was at fault. It was the war itself that was at fault. It's the same thing with psychotherapy.
James HillmanRead

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