The inventory process and stepping back in your life can sometimes be a very dark process. But it also can be extremely funny and surprising.

- Craig Charles

I was thinking - if we get a cell with a trouser press, we can make cheese toasties.

- Craig Charles

We were the only black family in an estate with 1,000 white families. Liverpool being quite racist in the Sixties, it was a bit grim growing up.

- Craig Charles

Once journalists have been rifling through your dustbins, you do try and keep them at arms' length.

- Craig Charles

Prison widens your circle of friends. In my stand-up, I can now talk about things that no one else has the right to touch.

- Craig Charles

Critics called me 'egregious' - I had to look that one up - and 'creepy', but now I don't read them, I weigh them.

- Craig Charles

It's evolve or die, really, you have to evolve, you have to move on otherwise it just becomes stagnant.

- Craig Charles

I'm busy and that's the way I like it - when I have too much downtime I get into trouble.

- Craig Charles

I have a stepladder. It's a very nice stepladder but it's sad that I never knew my real ladder.

- Craig Charles