I was just a kid. I think I stole a candy bar. I remember feeling so terrible. It was the worst shock. I was probably 7. That's my least favorite feeling: guilt.
There's humor in everything. There's gotta be humor in everything. - Amy Sedaris
There's humor in everything. There's gotta be humor in everything.
- Amy Sedaris
I like to be the one in charge of everything. - Amy Sedaris
I like to be the one in charge of everything.
Before you can give of yourself to others you must know what of yourself you have to give. Every person is special. In all the land there is only one… - Amy Sedaris
Before you can give of yourself to others you must know what of yourself you have to give. Every person is special. In all the land there is only one…
Accentuaute the positives - medicate the negatives. - Amy Sedaris
Accentuaute the positives - medicate the negatives.
I cried when I had no shoes, until I met a man who had no feet. And then I laughed REALLY hard. - Amy Sedaris
I cried when I had no shoes, until I met a man who had no feet. And then I laughed REALLY hard.
Most people think witches are a coven of lesbians dancing naked in the forest celebrating the semen stolen from imprisoned hypnotized males, which th… - Amy Sedaris
Most people think witches are a coven of lesbians dancing naked in the forest celebrating the semen stolen from imprisoned hypnotized males, which th…
The moment someone says, 'Hey, everyone, listen to the words in this song,' your party is over. - Amy Sedaris
The moment someone says, 'Hey, everyone, listen to the words in this song,' your party is over.
If you see a shy person, ask them some questions like, 'Why are you so shy? Tell everyone, we're all listening. - Amy Sedaris
If you see a shy person, ask them some questions like, 'Why are you so shy? Tell everyone, we're all listening.
I think it's good for a person to spend time alone. It gives them an opportunity to discover who they are and to figure out why they are always alone. - Amy Sedaris
I think it's good for a person to spend time alone. It gives them an opportunity to discover who they are and to figure out why they are always alone.
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