I think there are a lot of rules for women. We have a lot of expectations and a lot of rules for women. So we're expected to march in a straight line, and when we don't, all hell breaks loose.
Roxane GayRead
A lot of ink is given over to mythologizing female friendships as curious, fragile relationships that are always intensely fraught. Stop reading writing that encourages this mythology.
Interpretation
What this quote means
Female friendships are often depicted as complicated and fragile, but this view should be challenged.
Roxane Gay critiques the common narrative that portrays female friendships as overly complex and tension-filled. Instead of accepting this mythologized view, she encourages readers to seek out writings that offer a more nuanced and positive understanding of these connections, highlighting their strength and significance.
Themes
Female FriendshipsRelationshipsMythologyStrengthNuance
In practice
Example use cases
During a speech on women's empowerment, one might reference this quote to challenge stereotypes about female relationships.
More from Roxane Gay
All quotes →I believe in the freedom of expression, unequivocally - though, as I have written before, I wish more people would understand that freedom of expression is not freedom from consequence.
Roxane GayRead
Public intellectuals are often put in the position of having their words, no matter how off-the-cuff, treated as doctrine.
Roxane GayRead
No one is helped when cultural critics use their voices irresponsibly.
Roxane GayRead
I have never dreamed of being a princess. I have not longed for Prince Charming. I have and do long for something resembling a happily ever after. I am supposed to be above such flights of fantasy, but I am not. I am enamored of fairy tales.
Roxane GayRead
There has been, and there will continue to be, vigorous discussions about race in America. I worry that little will come of these discussions because we aren't addressing what must be done to change the current racial climate.
Roxane GayRead
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...What we need to do in the community, and in the city, and in the state. We need to stop airing our differences in front of the white man. Put the white man out of our meetings, number one, and then sit down and talk shop with each other. [That's] all you gotta do.
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The world says of marriage: A short joy and a long displeasure. But he who understands it finds in it delight, love, and joy without ceasing.
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Men and women shall have equal rights throughout the United States and every place subject to its jurisdiction.
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If you’re 35 and single and it’s a choice, it feels fine. So I didn’t settle with the wrong person yet. Big deal!
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