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You believe that a lover will bring you love, but it is your love that will bring you a lover.
Alan Cohen
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Interpretation

What this quote means

True love comes from within, not from others.

This quote emphasizes the idea that love is not something we receive passively from others, but rather something we generate from within ourselves. The belief that finding a lover will fulfill our need for love overlooks the importance of self-love and the emotional work required to cultivate meaningful relationships.

Themes

LoveSelf-LoveRelationshipsEmotions

In practice

Example use cases

Sharing this quote during a relationship workshop to highlight the importance of self-love.

More from Alan Cohen

As you recognize that you already own the wholeness you seek, and no one outside you can give you more than you already are, dysfunctional situations will evaporate like bad dreams exposed to the morning sun.
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Communication is an offering. When you tell someone your truth, you must release your expectation of what the other person should do with it. They may thank you profusely, love you forever, argue with you, or ignore you. It doesn't matter. Of course we hope the gift will be received with appreciation and thanks. But if it isn't we must not dictate. We've done our part, and we must trust the universe to do the rest.
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When you learn to say yes to yourself, you will be able to say no to others, with love.
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We attain freedom as we let go of whatever does not reflect our magnificence. A bird cannot fly high or far with a stone tied to its back. But release the impediment, and we are free to soar to unprecedented heights.
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You can be helping many people, but if you are not helping yourself, you have missed the one person you were born to heal.
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When you protect yourself from pain, be sure you do not protect yourself from love.
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