It is ludicrous to read the microwave direction on the boxes of food you buy, as each one will have a disclaimer: THIS WILL VARY WITH YOUR MICROWAVE. Loosely translated, this means, You're on your own, Bernice.
Interpretation
The quote humorously highlights the absurdity of relying on generic instructions for microwaves that may not apply to every appliance.
In this quote, Erma Bombeck uses humor to reflect on the common experience of following microwave instructions on food packaging, only to discover that the results may differ significantly due to variances in individual microwave models. The phrase 'You're on your own, Bernice' underscores the responsibility and unpredictability of cooking, conveying a light-hearted message about personal adaptability in the face of mundane tasks.
In practice
Sharing this quote at a cooking class to illustrate the importance of personal experimentation in the kitchen.
We've got a generation now who were born with semiequality. They don't know how it was before, so they think, this isn't too bad. We're working. We have our attache' cases and our three piece suits. I get very disgusted with the younger generation of women. We had a torch to pass, and they are just sitting there. They don't realize it can be taken away. Things are going to have to get worse before they join in fighting the battle.
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Making coffee has become the great compromise of the decade. It's the only thing "real" men do that doesn't seem to threaten their masculinity. To women, it's on the same domestic entry level as putting the spring back into the toilet-tissue holder or taking a chicken out of the freezer to thaw.
Not everyone is comfortable with the kissing ritual. My husband is one of them. Her refuses to press lips with anyone except his wife, mother, and dog. If someone wanted to give him mouth-to-mouth resuscitation, he would refuse until he had been formally introduced.
There's nothing sadder in this world than to awake Christmas morning and not be a child.
Maybe age is kinder to us than we think. With my bad eyes, I can't see how bad I look, and with my rotten memory, I have a good excuse for getting out of a lot of stuff.
I think a lot of people mistake my confidence on stage for cockiness in real life, and that's actually farthest from the truth. When I'm on stage, I'm that confident and that cocky because I have a microphone in my hand, and there's a few thousand people staring at me. And I know they're there to laugh.
The shortest unit of time in the multiverse is the New York Second, defined as the period of time between the traffic lights turning green and the cab behind you honking.
I'd worship the ground you walked on if only you walked in a better neighborhood.
The truth is, Pavlov's dog trained Pavlov to ring this bell just before the dog salivated.
The main difference between a cat and a lie is that a cat only has nine lives.
It was a nasty look. It made me feel as if I were something the dog had brought in and intended to bury later on, when he had time.
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