Marriage is one of the few institutions that allow a man to do as his wife pleases.
Do you realise that Eve was the only woman who ever took a man's side? - Milton Berle
Do you realise that Eve was the only woman who ever took a man's side?
- Milton Berle
The problem with life is, by the time you can read women like a book, your library card has expired. - Milton Berle
The problem with life is, by the time you can read women like a book, your library card has expired.
Folk who don't know why America is the Land of Promise should be here during an election campaign. - Milton Berle
Folk who don't know why America is the Land of Promise should be here during an election campaign.
You can lead a man to Congress, but you can't make him think. - Milton Berle
You can lead a man to Congress, but you can't make him think.
My wife and I have a perfect understanding. I don't try to run her life, and I don't try to run mine. - Milton Berle
My wife and I have a perfect understanding. I don't try to run her life, and I don't try to run mine.
My doctor told me that jogging could add years to my life. I think he was right. I feel ten years older already. - Milton Berle
My doctor told me that jogging could add years to my life. I think he was right. I feel ten years older already.
Laughter is an instant vacation. - Milton Berle
Laughter is an instant vacation.
I'd rather be a could-be if I cannot be an are; because a could-be is a maybe who is reaching for a star. I'd rather be a has-been than a might-have-… - Milton Berle
I'd rather be a could-be if I cannot be an are; because a could-be is a maybe who is reaching for a star. I'd rather be a has-been than a might-have-…
You're aging when your actions creak louder than your words. - Milton Berle
You're aging when your actions creak louder than your words.
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