The only mystery about the cat is why it ever decided to become a domestic animal.

- Compton Mackenzie

Beer does not taste like itself unless it is chasing a dram of neat whisky down the gullet - preferably two drams

- Compton Mackenzie

You are offered a piece of bread and butter that feels like a damp handkerchief and sometimes, when cucumber is added to it, like a wet one.

- Compton Mackenzie

For me, one of the pleasures of cats company is their devotion to bodily comfort.

- Compton Mackenzie

Nobody who is not prepared to spoil cats will get from them the reward they are able to give to those who do spoil them.

- Compton Mackenzie

Love makes the world go round? Not at all. Whiskey makes it go round twice as fast.

- Compton Mackenzie

Women do not find it difficult nowadays to behave like men, but they often find it extremely difficult to behave like gentlemen

- Compton Mackenzie