Be persistent and just keep going to open mics no matter what, even if just to watch and not perform. You'll find that even at your worst keep your h…

- Pete Holmes

I'm trying to manufacture a sleepover feel; like a tree house or a clubhouse. I want people to be silly and play and feel safe and some people, you h…

- Pete Holmes

I have never been political, which for a straight white man that's kind of a byproduct of privilege growing up that I was kind of like, "Who cares wh…

- Pete Holmes

One of my obsessions in life is that we have the tools to manufacture moments and real things, but it's overwhelming and there's a lot of fear and yo…

- Pete Holmes

If you have a friend with a blond mustache, he wants to touch you.

- Pete Holmes

I'm trying to, with my stand-up and with the podcast, give people these little stupid things to give them happiness. I know that sounds lofty or like…

- Pete Holmes