Ninety isn't old. You're old when your doctor doesn't X-ray you any more - he just holds you up to the light!
George Washington, who said to his father, Dad, if I never tell I lie, how am I ever gonna become President? Never got a dinner! - Red Buttons
George Washington, who said to his father, Dad, if I never tell I lie, how am I ever gonna become President? Never got a dinner!
- Red Buttons
Aladdin, who said to his wife, I know it's not a lamp, keep rubbing! Never got a dinner! - Red Buttons
Aladdin, who said to his wife, I know it's not a lamp, keep rubbing! Never got a dinner!
John Travolta, who said, My Saturday night fever was nothing compared to my Sunday morning rash. Never got a dinner! - Red Buttons
John Travolta, who said, My Saturday night fever was nothing compared to my Sunday morning rash. Never got a dinner!
Orville Wright said to his brother, "Wilbur, you were only in the air for 12 seconds. How could my luggage be in Cleveland?" - Red Buttons
Orville Wright said to his brother, "Wilbur, you were only in the air for 12 seconds. How could my luggage be in Cleveland?"
King Solomon, who said to his thousand wives, Who doesn't have a headache tonight? Never got a dinner! - Red Buttons
King Solomon, who said to his thousand wives, Who doesn't have a headache tonight? Never got a dinner!
When people ask me if Dean Martin drank, let me put it this way. If Dracula bit Dean in the neck, he'd get a Bloody Mary. - Red Buttons
When people ask me if Dean Martin drank, let me put it this way. If Dracula bit Dean in the neck, he'd get a Bloody Mary.
Goliath's mother, who said to Goliath, Stop running around with David! You're always coming home stoned! Never got a dinner! - Red Buttons
Goliath's mother, who said to Goliath, Stop running around with David! You're always coming home stoned! Never got a dinner!
Moses, who said to the children of Israel, Wear your galoshes; I never did this trick before. Never got a dinner! - Red Buttons
Moses, who said to the children of Israel, Wear your galoshes; I never did this trick before. Never got a dinner!
Alexander the Great, who said on his wedding night, It's only a nickname. Never got a dinner! - Red Buttons
Alexander the Great, who said on his wedding night, It's only a nickname. Never got a dinner!
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