Of all the nonsense written about love, none is more absurd than the notion that ideal love is selfless. To love is to see myself in you and to wish to celebrate myself with you. What I love is the embodiment of my values in another person. Love is an act of self-assertion, self-expression and a celebration of being alive.
Interpretation
True love involves seeing oneself in another and celebrating that connection.
In this quote, Nathaniel Branden challenges the common misconception that ideal love is completely selfless. He argues that love fundamentally involves a recognition of oneself in the other person and an expression of one's values and identity through that relationship. Love, according to Branden, is not just about giving up oneself, but about affirming one's existence and celebrating the bond shared with another individual.
In practice
In a speech about relationships, one might say, 'As Nathaniel Branden pointed out, true love is about seeing ourselves in our partners.'
Living consciously is seeking to be aware of everything that bears on our interests, actions, values, purposes, and goals. It is the willingness to confront facts, pleasant or unpleasant. It is the desire to discover our mistakes and correct them . . . it is the quest to keep expanding our awareness and understanding, both of the world external to self and the world within.
If you are an adult, you are responsible for your life and well-being. No one owes you the fulfillment of your needs or wants; no one is here on earth to serve you. If you respect the principle of self-ownership, you understand that no one else owns you and that you do not own anyone else. Only on this understanding can there be peace on earth and good will among human beings.
It is a mistake to look at someone who is self assertive and say, "It's easy for her, she has good self-esteem." One of the ways you build self-esteem is by being self-assertive when it is not easy to do so. There are always times when self-assertiven ess requires courage, no matter how high your self-esteem.
Living consciously reflects the conviction that sight is preferable to blindness; that respecting the facts of reality is more satisfying than denying them; that evasion does not make the unreal real or the real unreal; that it is better to correct your mistakes that to pretend they do not exist; and that the more conscious you are of facts bearing on your life and goals, the more wisely and effectively you can act.
One of the hardest expressions of self-assertiveness is challenging your limiting beliefs.
How do we keep our inner fire alive? Two things, at minimum, are needed: an ability to appreciate the positives in our life – and a commitment to action. Every day, it's important to ask and answer these questions: ‘What's good in my life?’ and ‘What needs to be done?
I need to capture my sprite with trembling hands. Except I could crush her. Wonder how many small things of beauty - flowers, seashells, dragonflies - have met such a demise. Wonder how much fragile love has collapsed beneath the weight of confession.
There is no love; there are only proofs of love. Whatever love I might feel in my heart, others will see only my action.
From here on after let's stay the way we are right now. And share all the love and laughter that a lifetime will allow.
Love can be angry... with a kind of anger in which there is no gall, like the dove's and not the ravens.
So much of the language of love was like that: you devoured someone with your eyes, you drank in the sight of him, you swallowed him whole. Love was substance, broken down and beating through your bloodstream.
Love is at the Center of our being, and the calm, continuous pulsations of life are governed by Love.
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