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But hurting ourselves to inflict pain on others is just another cry to be loved.
Mitch Albom
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Interpretation

What this quote means

Self-harm to hurt others often stems from a deep desire for love and acceptance.

This quote by Mitch Albom conveys that when individuals engage in harmful behaviors towards themselves in an attempt to harm others, it reveals an underlying need for love and validation. The longing for connection and affection might manifest in destructive ways, indicating that the root cause is a cry for support and acceptance rather than a straightforward desire to inflict pain.

Themes

PainLoveSelf-HarmRelationshipsAcceptance

In practice

Example use cases

In a counseling session discussing the importance of self-love.

More from Mitch Albom

For better or for worse, I've watched people die in front of me. I see how they are in the end. And they're not cynical. In the end, they wanna hold somebody's hand. And that's real to me.
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If we tend to the things that are important in life, if we are right with those we love, and behave in line with our faith, our lives will not be cursed with the aching throb of unfulfilled business. Our words will always be sincere, our embraces will be tight. We will never wallow in the agony of β€˜I could have, I should have’. We can sleep in a storm. And when its time, our goodbyes will be complete.
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Young men go to war. Sometimes because they have to, sometimes because they want to. Always, they feel they are supposed to. This comes from the sad, layered stories of life, which over the centuries have seen courage confused with picking up arms, and cowardice confused with laying them down.
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What about a man who sits down to wonder Why life has cheated him? Thinks about his situation Hangs his head and cries Will we pretend, his problems don't exist? He's reaching out for help-will we selfishly resist? What about your brother? He's crying What about your brother? He's dying What about your brother?
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Sacrfice," the captain said. "You made one. I made one. We all made them. But you were angry over yours. You kept thinking about what you lost. You didn't get it. Sacrifice is a part of life. It's supposed to be. It's not something to regret. It's something to aspire to.
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The way you get meaning into your life is to devote yourself to loving others, devote yourself to your community around you, and devote yourself to creating something that gives you purpose and meaning.
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