My dad was never one of those dads you could ask for a quarter if you saw a gumball machine. Instead he had one of those black American Express cards…

- S.A. Bodeen

It's easier to revise lousy writing than to revise a blank sheet of paper.

- S.A. Bodeen

Yeah, well, wish in one hand, crap in the other, and see which fills up first

- S.A. Bodeen

That night I dreamed of turduckens.

- S.A. Bodeen

Place unopened pouch in warm water for 5-10 minutes. Unopened pouch may be laid on a warm surface. Lay unopened pouch in direct sunlight. Not much ch…

- S.A. Bodeen

What is a turducken? An exclusive culinary creation available by special order from some little Cajun town down south. Entirely deboned, a turducken …

- S.A. Bodeen

I would have rather had a dad with change jingling in his pocket; one who would have spent the last forty minutes of the world raking leaves for his …

- S.A. Bodeen

T.S Elliot was wrong. My world ended with a bang the minute we entered the Compound and the silver door closed behind us. The sound was brutal. Final.

- S.A. Bodeen