When a stray animal crosses your path, it may be as close to God as you're going to get in this lifetime.

- Kinky Friedman

I rarely meddled in the cat's personal affairs and she rarely meddled in mine. Neither of us was foolish enough to attribute human emotions to our pe…

- Kinky Friedman

If you're paranoid long enough, sooner or later you're gonna be right.

- Kinky Friedman

Well, I just said that Jesus and I were both Jewish and that neither of us ever had a job, we never had a home, we never married and we traveled arou…

- Kinky Friedman

An editor's job is to take something great and make it good.

- Kinky Friedman

Politics is the only field in which the more experience you have, the worse you get.

- Kinky Friedman

Golf is the only opportunity that middle-aged WASPs have to dress up like a pimp.

- Kinky Friedman

People may surprise you with unexpected kindness. Dogs have a depth of loyalty that often we seem unworthy of. But the love of a cat is a blessing, a…

- Kinky Friedman

Whether your destination is heaven or hell, you always have to change planes in Dallas.

- Kinky Friedman