They keep saying that sea levels are rising an' all this. It's nowt to do with the icebergs melting, it's because there's too many fish in it. Get rid of some of the fish and the water will drop. Simple. Basic science.
Yesterday, I did some painting then went out to buy an onion and came home and watched 'University Challenge.' The onion was probably the highlight. - Karl Pilkington
Yesterday, I did some painting then went out to buy an onion and came home and watched 'University Challenge.' The onion was probably the highlight.
- Karl Pilkington
I find that if you just talk, your mouth comes up with stuff. - Karl Pilkington
I find that if you just talk, your mouth comes up with stuff.
It's weird how me and that insect are miles apart in terms of lifestyle, yet we both like a biscuit. - Karl Pilkington
It's weird how me and that insect are miles apart in terms of lifestyle, yet we both like a biscuit.
Pigeons: They've got wings, but they walk a lot. - Karl Pilkington
Pigeons: They've got wings, but they walk a lot.
People who live in a glass house have to answer the door. - Karl Pilkington
People who live in a glass house have to answer the door.
If you’re worrying about the wrinkles on your bollocks I’d say your life’s pretty good - Karl Pilkington
If you’re worrying about the wrinkles on your bollocks I’d say your life’s pretty good
If you had five photos of anuses, I could not point mine out. - Karl Pilkington
If you had five photos of anuses, I could not point mine out.
I saw a bee have a heart attack. - Karl Pilkington
I saw a bee have a heart attack.
If you don't have a plan, you can end up doing some interesting things. - Karl Pilkington
If you don't have a plan, you can end up doing some interesting things.
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