Probably all of my advice is bad advice.

- Kurt Braunohler

I've had a good run of birthdays, and now no one will notice when I die.

- Kurt Braunohler

Improv requires your audience to be informed about what improv is. With stand-up, anybody can sit down and watch stand-up and laugh at jokes.

- Kurt Braunohler

If you're waiting for inspiration, you'll wait until you're dead.

- Kurt Braunohler

Just start writing and you'll find what you want to say.

- Kurt Braunohler

Paint yourself into a corner so that you don't have any other option but to continue forward.

- Kurt Braunohler

I think having a daughter is just terrifying. Women in the world get the short end of the stick all the time in many, many ways, and so it's just ter…

- Kurt Braunohler

New York is a place that can grind you down and spit you out. A true New Yorker doesn't get ground down, he gets polished.

- Kurt Braunohler

I grew up very Catholic. I wanted to be a priest.

- Kurt Braunohler